It's my first CAT-URDAY!!

In honor of my first Caturday post, I wanted to share a few pics I made with this amazing app called "Cat Effects." Yes, I know, it's completely lame that I've poured ANY time into this but I've found it to be terribly addictive. The best is when Chris and I are in a room together and I send him a picture of himself with a mountain lion in the background and I'm all, "hey, hon, be careful going to the bathroom because, ya know, there's a mountain lion chilling in the hallway right behind you."

So in the spirit of this, thought I'd share a few of my most proudest creations:

Chris thinks he's just enjoying a cold one, but little does he know, he's being stalked from behind...

My dad is one hard-core dude! To get this close to a tiger (and a pissed off one at that) takes GUTS.

David (brother-in-law) enjoyed the company of more than just yours truly after his slice of pizza. Cuteness overload alert WHAT??!!

The guys and Simba, waiting for a concert.

So I apologize profusely for this post. Please don't unsubscribe from me for this. Please.

On holiday junk food...

So Chris and I started this experiment that involves "testing" a whole bunch of unhealthy holiday treats and reviewing them. It was TOTALLY his idea and I really couldn't say no. I mean, come on, he came home with the biggest grin on his face and had arms full of holiday treats, for "experimental purposes," he said. How could I say no?

Not to mention the fact that I can't run for like a month due to tendonitis that just won't go away, so the calories I take in from this experiment, well, they have nowhere to go but my hips and ass. Yay. But.....this is all for the sake of love. And bloggery.

So here's my philosophy on junk food - I LOVE sweets. There is no doubt that I have got a horrific sweet tooth. As a tween/teen, I noshed on Little Debbie snack cakes for lunch, giant chocolate chip cookies that they served at my school cafeteria (they were pretty frickkin' amazing), and my parents and I would usually have a half gallon of Breyers in the freezer that we'd go through in, oh, 2 days. It was horrible.

So oddly enough, when I got to college I actually lost 15 pounds my freshman year, mainly because the food choices on campus were, um, sub-par. Plus I walked. A lot. And somewhere in the midst of all of this, I started to develop healthy eating habits. As an adult, I get giddy over health food stores, especially ones that serve tofu wraps and fresh sides like tabbouli and bean salads - YUM. When Chris is out of town and I'm a one-woman show, I could go nuts and eat at the restaurants Chris doesn't like. But instead, I cook roasted veggies and nosh on quinoa and kale.

I love the way healthy food makes me feel. I can't imagine going back to junk food. Even when we order pizza (a rarity), I always accompany my 2 slices with a giant kale salad.

So you can imagine how difficult this experiment is for me. My greatest fear is that I will go back there again. I'm afraid that the memories conjured up by this will make me go nuts, and should things get stressful enough over the next few weeks, I may go into the kitchen and have a snack cake binge. Especially since I work from home 2 days a week...my hips and ass will double in size by 2013. Oh dear...

Here's how I typically handle sweets. I WILL allow myself to have dessert if we're out at a nice restaurant and they serve something I really love. Just because this is such a rarity, I think it's really good to do things like that. And each day, I typically allow myself one sweet treat (usually well under 200 calories). Because I've found that so often, one cookie is actually enough. Or even a spoonful of nutella. But it's usually a cookie that's made with very few ingredients, or if we do ice cream I get plan vanilla bean (the one with like 5 ingredients). Wow, I'm such a control freak. This is borderline nutty, right?

So now I'm relinquishing control to the snack cakes. Wish me luck.

Here's a link to our experiment.

 I'm dying to know your thoughts!

Also, here's a cute picture of owl kisses. This is me and Chris (d'awwwww):

Wishing everyone peace, love and sparkly things today!!

So let's talk about the Rockafire Explosion.

Okay, so I grew up in the 80's and lived in a small-ish town called Macon, GA. While many things about Macon were not so great (humidity, a downtown that did the opposite of thrive, very traditional local officials who were not fans of progression), there were a few key things about the town that were quite charming. The one that spoke most to me as a kiddo was Showbiz Pizza. Any Maconites who grew up in the 80's should definitely be able to remember this place. And from what I understand, the place was a franchise with restaurants in other parts of the country as well.

Showbiz was just magical. There was an arcade with skee ball, video games and of course the ball pit where kids would sometimes pee (not me - ewww gross, but I sure did overlook that - come on, the ball pit was FUN and a little pee never hurt anybody). BUT, you guys, the arcade had NOTHING on the Rock-afire Explosion. That was the name of Billy Bob's animatronic band!!

So I may have been a tiny bit afraid of Billy Bob. He was the giant bear that sang Beach Boys tunes onstage with Fats the Gorilla (even scarier than Billy Bob), Dook, the drummer (a dog with floppy ears), a beach bear that was kind of an airhead, and a mouse cheerleader named Mitzi. (There were other characters as well, but these are the ones I choose to remember - and it's my blog, so deal with it). Billy Bob was GREAT onstage, but after the shows, he would sometimes come out into the audience to meet the kids. Thank God Fats the Gorilla never did that. Billy Bob was scary enough. After being entertained by fun music and pizza, the last thing I needed was to throw up all over a giant gorilla out of sheer fear.

(source: http://tech.mit.edu/V129/N14/graphics/rockafire.html)

Fats the Gorilla - OMG so creepy - thank you for staying on stage!!

I remember when they closed Showbiz down, replacing it with an Olive Garden. It was hands down one of the most devastating experiences of my life. When you have that connection with a place, one that is both awesome and kind of scary, it changes you, ya know? The Olive Garden will never do that for me.

Showbiz, thank you for teaching me these life lessons:

1. The Rockafire Explosion makes any food (even TERRIBLE pizza) taste so good.
2. Ignore the pee. Just have fun!
3. Giant bears are magnificent creatures. One should both fear and respect them. And NEVER get too close.

Several years ago, when Chris and I were at the Brunswick fair, we heard it. Help Me Rhonda. We looked at each other with wide eyes. No way. But yes, it was true. The Rock-afire Explosion was just around the corner. We were so excited and mesmerized (and maybe just a tiny bit scared) by it all that we just stood and watched, our mouths gaping open. It was, hands down, one of the most beautiful moments of our marriage. We both knew, right then and there, that we shared that same feeling - that same fondness, respect and nostalgia for the big country bear and his pals.

(source: http://www.soapinthebathroom.com/interview-with-rock-afire-creator-aaron-fechter/)

The whole group - one big happy, kinda creepy family :)

On Chinese food, life and goats...

About a week ago I had a complete breakdown over Chinese food. Well, it wasn't actually OVER Chinese food; however that was the said catalyst of this breakdown. After an especially stressful week, I stopped by one of very few Chinese takeout places on the way home and wanted tofu and vegetables, expecting to pay maybe $5 or $6 for a small order. The cheapest version on the menu was $10.50 and it included all these extras (egg roll, soup, a kitchen sink, etc.). I didn't want all the freaking extras - I JUST WANTED TOFU AND VEGETABLES!!! They wouldn't even consider doing that for me, so I stormed out and had a complete freakout in my car.

When I finally calmed down (and my husband confronted me about my complete withdrawal and moodiness, over the past few weeks; not to mention the fact that I hadn't gotten a decent night's sleep in a while due to 1, 2, or 3AM anxiety attacks), it finally occurred to me that I was in the midst of a depressive episode. I hadn't had one for quite some time, and being a social worker, I should be able to identify these things, right? Maybe in others, but not so much in myself. Coming to this realization did not excuse my behavior, however it was a wake-up call that some things in my life need to change.

So coincidentally, following this breakdown/wake-up call, we are in the midst of moving into a new condo. It's smaller and much more unique than the cookie cutter apartment we currently live in (plus it's way cheaper AND it's located across the street from a really great park), so I'm just happy as a clam. Frankly, in finding a new place to live, I could care less about square footage - the only two things that matter to me are a large, walk-in closet and a big kitchen; both of which are spectacular in this condo. Yay for closets and kitchens!! But I digress.

I am taking this week off from work in order to re-evaluate/re-define/re-organize my life. Here are the promises I am making myself, starting right now:

1. I will no longer eat whatever I want on the weekends because "all bets are off" since I eat so healthy during the week. Eating unhealthy food always makes me feel like crap, so I'll continue my healthy eating choices as often as possible (weekday or weekend) and when I really crave something unhealthy, I'll eat a small-moderate amount of it (no more binging on entire bags of chex mix).

2. I will meditate for at least 10 minutes a day, NO MATTER WHAT. I will also prioritize finding a more concrete spiritual path.

3. I will make every possible effort to stop taking things personally.

4. I will indulge in experiences, not stuff. In fact, I will continue to give away as much unnecessary "excessive crap" I possibly can. Unloading and having less will undoubtedly give me so much more peace of mind and will hence impact #2.

5. I will say no when I should. I will not operate on guilt. When I begin to feel guilt, I will learn to recognize it as a sign that something is off and I need to re-evaluate things.

6. I will clean my car and I will make it a priority to keep it clean. Just because I'm by nature a messy person does not mean that I have to live that way. It's never to late to change those habits.

7. I will exercise 5-6 days a week (as I am) but will not beat myself up if I miss a workout. In fact, I will stop beating myself up in general. I will also stop apologizing for things that are not my fault.

8. I won't be hatin' on others. In fact, I will do the opposite. Through not taking things personally, I will teach myself to strengthen the relationships I have and to open myself up to new ones. It recently occurred to me that perhaps, maybe just maybe, one of the most important purposes of human existence is connection: with God (or whatever higher power you may believe in), with the universe, with EACH OTHER. And once we realize these connections and embrace them with love and acceptance, PERHAPS we can achieve a higher level of consciousness and thus, be happier and less sucky. Just a thought...

9. And most importantly - I will sparkle more. Much more.

That is it.

Now for the silly part of my post. So I've sort of got an obsession over miniature farm animals. I had previously been pretty certain I would eventually get an African Pygmy goat. Well, I've changed my mind. HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A MINIATURE NIGERIAN DWARF GOAT??

Source: http://www.tanglewoodfarmminiatures.com/cgi-bin/MySQLdb?VIEW=
/minis/categories/viewdownload1.txt&productid=446

Reflections of the summer past...

I am so excited that it is finally September. I LOVE Fall more than puppies (yah, I know) and look forward to all of the super fun, magical offerings the season has in store for me. That being said, I want to share some really cool discoveries I have made over the summer, being that it's been a minute (or two) since I posted anything.

So with that, here is a list of awesome discoveries in my life:

1. Estate Sales - WHAT? Who knew that looking through dead peoples' stuff could be so fun? Chris and I have recently jumped on this train and found it to be both incredibly depressing and quite invigorating. It's weird going through someone's house, sifting through their Christmas decorations (dead people seem to have a lot of them) and other stuff, then deciding that it's just too sad (and sometimes creepy), feeling bad and then leaving empty handed. (BTW, anyone ever heard of haunted objects? Well, if an object were to be haunted, I GUARANTEE it would have come from an estate sale). Then we always go get a beer and talk about life.

2. The connection between mind and body. I know, sounds really frickkin' deep. Well, that's because it IS DEEP. People so oftentimes have pains because - wait for it - they are experiencing some sort of emotional struggles that they don't know how to process in an effective manner, and thus, said emotional struggles manifest via physical symptoms!!! I learned this because I just kept turning my ankles, over and over again, and a dear friend pointed out that perhaps I have too many different things going on in that brilliant mind of mine and am thus struggling to effectively manage this plethora of incredibly insightful thoughts (most recent internal conflicts - which My Little Pony would I be and what type of kale should I be purchasing, organic or non-organic - side note, always go with organic kale).  The key to fixing these problems? BALANCE. Meditation and yoga is so important, you guys. OMG (I'm serious).

3. My cat really does look an awful lot like Hitler. Not sure how cool this is, but really, it's kinda creepy. Especially when you open the dryer and find THAT.  **shudder**

4. Being vegetarian-ish has made me feel incredibly empowered and the opposite of guilty. When I drive by a chicken truck now, I can just smile and wave, completely and totally guiltless. But I will NEVER, EVER judge another person for eating meat. That's ugly, and mean. And I'm still noshing on fish, so I really have no room to be judgy.

5. I think I should get a school bus, just because it would make my life much easier. Then I could take whomever I want wherever I want (within a 200 or so mile radius) without fear of not having room for everybody. That would be really nice, and people would love me even more than they do. Sigh. I would call it "The Sparkle Bus" and paint it purple. Because, really, is it THAT necessary that school buses be so darn yellow? I think I'm going to start a campaign to make school buses more sparkly. I'll call it "The Sparkly Bus Project." Who's with me?

Make it yo'self! Black Bean Burger Salad

So I know we all have our fave veggie burgers, right? I myself am a Morningstar Farms girl, but most people I know like Boca. But have you ever actually looked at the ingredient list on these puppies? It's pretty scary. Loads of long, artificall-y sounding words that CANNOT be good for our systems. And they're supposed to be healthy? Umm, no. So you'd think the black bean burgers would be the safest bet, right? Well, that was my thinking too, however I found that many black bean burgers are also loaded with crap. So I decided to make my own and let me tell you, it was a super fun, spectacularly successful culinary adventure. :)

Black Bean Burger Salad with Homemade Garlic Guacomole

Black Bean Burgers

1 can black beans
1/2 Vidalia onion, chopped
1 green pepper, chopped
1 tbsp spicy mustard (I like TJ's garlic aioli mustard)
1/3 cup oats
sea salt
fresh ground pepper
1 egg

Blend everything together in a food processor. Form the mixture into four patties. Heat 2 tbsp olive oil in a pan over medium-high. Fry those puppies for 3-5 minutes per side. They may fall apart a bit when you flip them but trust me, they are worth it.

Homemade Guac

1 avocado
juice of 1 lime
2 cloves of garlic, chopped
sea salt
pepper
dash liquid smoke
handful of freshly chopped tomatoes

Mash together in a bowl. That is it.

Serve black bean burgers over a bed of butter lettuce with homemade guac, a sprinkling of jack cheese, a dab of sour cream and the dressing of your choice (I used salsa ranch - the yogurt kind that's super low in calories but sooooo delicious). Eat up!!

A vegetable that is TRULY newsworthy

So this week in the news I learned that a man ate anther man's face, PLUS another man ate his roommate's brain and heart. Sick sick eww eww gross. This is the kind of thing that keeps me awake at night.  I mean, why would ANYONE want to go eat another person's brain, or face when there's plenty of delicious, nutritious food available at your local supermarket? Like kale. Kale is one of the most delicious things out there that many people don't really know how to enjoy.  Plus it has LOADS of incredible health benefits and is power punched with vitamin C, D, tons of calcium AND iron. WHAT??!! I bet if those two fellas had more kale in their diet, they may not have gone all cannibally. Just saying. With that, I'd love to share a really great kale recipe I've recently created:

This has no title. It's just plain good. Saute kale in a tablespoonful of olive oil. Pour some apple cider vinegar and sprinkle some brown sugar on it as it's being cooked. I also added in a tiny bit of liquid smoke which really seemed to enhance the flava. Enjoy! I love this so much I've eaten it for lunch like every day for the past 2 weeks. It is THAT good.

If you're feeling frisky and really want to make it exciting, scramble in a couple of eggs, then top with a bit of sprinkled goat cheese.

Try it and tell me you don't love it. I DARE YOU.